Five minutes into our flight and we were already in meltdown territory. My son had lost his packet of tissues. Ordinarily, this might not be a big deal, but to my seven-year-old with ADHD and OCD, it’s an end-of-the-world scenario. As I calmly tried to manage the situation, I thought to myself, “how will we manage the next 14 hours?”
We were on our first long-haul flight as a family, travelling from London to Japan. His tics had worsened considerably over the past couple of weeks – fast, hard blinking, mouth jerking, coughing and eye-rolling. The prospect of his first long-haul flight was clearly as overwhelming and stressful for him as it was exciting, and as a result, it was for me too. Preparing for a trip as a parent always requires extra forethought, but doing so on behalf of a neurodivergent child is a whole new level of organisation. Along with the usual drawing materials and snacks, I had to consider all eventualities. What if Faelan, my son, decides he can’t eat the plane food because a sauce is touching something he thinks it’s not supposed to? How can I limit screen time, which I know makes his tics harder to manage? What if he feels unable to sit still or stay quiet when everyone is trying to sleep?
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I spoke to Dr Patricia Britto, an educational psychologist, who agrees that flying long-haul with a child who has ADHD can be challenging but believes that with some planning and simple strategies, it can go much more smoothly.
Dr Britto told me it’s a good idea to prepare your child before the trip, as well as organising activities, so we’d tried a bit of in-flight role play in the weeks leading up to the journey. My son hadn’t managed to stay in character for longer than half an hour. Perhaps in some small way, it helped, though. “Knowing what to expect can reduce their worry or stress,” she says. “Talk about the trip step-by-step: the airport, security, boarding and flying. You could even show pictures or videos of airplanes to help them understand and practice wearing headphones or sitting still for short times at home.”
We opted to fly Finnair for our trip, voted the “world’s cleanest airline” by Skytrax – something that appealed to us immediately since Faelan developed an intense germ phobia during the Covid lockdown that’s never quite gone away. He even packed his stylus for the touchscreen TVs. We booked premium economy bulkhead seats. More than anything, our seat choices were made to be considerate of others – no one sitting in front means no seat for my son to kick when he feels frustrated. As soon as we arrived at the airport, I realised I’d forgotten our Sunflower Lanyard, which made me feel vulnerable (not that he’d have agreed to wear it, anyway).
